Monday, April 12, 2010

Letting Brandon Stay Home

Well the conversation started yesterday with Brandon about going to school today for the first time with crutches.  He fell this weekend with them but was ok but if he falls and re-fractures the hip again we are looking at some really bad problems and a total hip replacement.

So I awoke this morning at 5:30am with I guess kind of a panic attack, I really felt like I shouldn't send him to school today.   I went into our home office and told my husband what happened and said I am not sending him to school to which he said ok.

I don't know if at this point it is just fear and I am living in it at the moment or if it was God telling me he needed to be here.  Two years ago June 5th Alyssa, our oldest daughter (while we were visiting my husbands family that live in Chattanooga TN) went swimming with some friends of ours there.  She got in water that was too deep and she isn't a super great swimmer-can swim but not laps or anything.  Anyways, she was on a board playing around and got were it was too deep and didn't know it and stepped down off the board to which she was not planning going under and did, with her mouth open and all took in all that water started to panic, screaming for help but the pool was crowded and no one could here her over the noise.  The friend's mom that took her and her sister all of a sudden couldn't see Alyssa and had this terrible fear, ran to the side of the pool screaming and dove in with a life guard-they pulled her out-she was blue and not breathing.  A lady was there swimming that day who was a nurse by profession-she ran over and started CPR on Alyssa and got her breathing until the medics got there and rushed her to the hospital.  We knew nothing of this happening because we were not there, our friends called us on the way to the hospital to let us know she was being taken there by ambulance.  That was the longest 15 minutes of my life-the drive there not knowing what we would see or how see would be.  She was breathing when we got there-very out of it-she could speak a little.  They were running all sorts of test on her and her head was in a brace.  I never felt so helpless as in those moments.  My husband and I fell to our knees-weeping and crying out to God to save our little girl-to help her brain heal completely.  The Dr told us from the levels or acid and her sugar in her blood that they could tell that she had been without oxygen for at least a minute.  They kept her over night and watched her lungs-she had taken in a lot of water and monitored her brain and oxygen levels.  She went home the next day-she is whole and fine and no brain damage ever occurred.
All that to say-that morning I felt like I shouldn't send her and so did my husband and Alyssa her self we found out later didn't really want to go but was afraid they would be upset if she didn't-but we didn't say anything to each other about it-we didn't want to be over protective-she doesn't get to see this friend but 2 times a year and so on.  So we let her go.  Now looking back I think God was telling her and us to keep her home-He still protected her and sent and angel(we still have never been able to find out who the lady was that saved her life) to save her life that day-but I can't help but wondered had we told each other how we felt that morning and she would have stayed home that it would have never happened.

Sometimes I wonder am I being still enough to hear God speaking to me.  We agreed that day if we ever felt that way again we would follow our inner feelings no matter what anyone else said or thought.
So today Brandon is home.  We have still not heard from Cook's so please pray we would hear something today-I am thinking I may pull Brandon out of school for the last 5 weeks and home school him.  I don't know what to do-please pray for wisdom for me.

On this Pathway-


Lynnette Kraft said...

I think keeping Brandon home IS the right thing. I have another story like yours...

When we first got married, we met a couple who grew up in missionary families. Jeremy grew up in Papau New Guinea. His mother got teased because she was so careful with her son. So, one day when she was in a prayer meeting (or something like that), she let her 3 year old son play outside. She worried about him, but forced herself to toughen up and not check on him. When the meeting was over, she couldn't find Jeremy. They finally found him but he was lost IN THE JUNGLE for several hours! Can you imagine?

Barb, Jeremy's mom told me "Never go against your motherly instinct. God gave that to you and it is to be listened to."

So, GO WITH that motherly instinct and praise God for it!


cooperkelly4 said...

Hi Jill, so praying for you for wisdom. Your momma's heart, led by the Lord, can do this. ( "I can do ALL THINGS through Christ who strengthens me.") When you first start homeschooling it can be overwhelming, not to mention everything else you are dealing with. Please let me know if I can help you sort out your homeschool day, etc. (warning, I am not an expert) Praying you hear from Cooks today too. Kelly